Maybe the actual Florida of Canada is Dubai

You can ask the CPP’s former CEO

“Florida of Canada” got trending on Twitter when a Harvard University epidemiologist expressed vindication about new masking rules at Quebec elementary schools. Eric Fiegl-Ding then noted he was watching the COVID-19 resurgence in B.C., where provincial health officer Bonnie Henry is being villainized by conspiracy theorists.

The most expensive jab ever

An evening email from the head of the Canada Pension Plan about getting vaccinated during a “very personal” trip to Dubai turned into a morning resignation for Mark Machin, whose Toronto house was recently sold for $18 million. Canada can soon dream of catching up to U.A.E. speed, now that AstraZeneca has been approved.

The new U.S. secretary of state is seeing the other side of the border closure. Antony Blinken said science will decide when traffic can freely flow again, during a CBC interview prior to his virtual visit to Ottawa. In the meantime, stories continue about confusion over who’s essential enough to cross, along with quarantine hotel debacles.

A new record of ridiculousness

The cartoons of Toronto lawyer Caryma Sa’d are gaining more attention, as her panels posted to Instagram cover news like the city filing an injunction upon the builder of tiny wooden structures or dissonant messaging from the province. Inspiration comes easier for Sa’d when the jokes write themselves, based on what COVID-19 has done to news:

Tory Lanez can no longer publicly comment on his alleged shooting of Meghan Thee Stallion. The injunction follows the Canadian rapper making an album on which he claimed innocence, with a video featuring Chair Girl. (It’s also unlikely Lanez will get more shout-outs on Norm Kelly’s revived Twitter hip-hop account.)

Finally, dystopia in quarantine

The Handmaid’s Tale returned to shooting in Toronto and environs in September—after getting shut down in March—and production stretched into the winter. The challenge for producers was how to get all of the cast north of the border, given how some actors were filming parts between other jobs. The fourth-season trailer shows off the effort: