For the people against $29.99 Lysol wipes

DoFo disinfects the pandemic racket

Ontario’s premier put all COVID-19 price gougers on notice, but specifically called out Pusateri’s, sighted charging significantly more than the typical cost of Lysol disinfecting wipes. The high-end Toronto grocer apologized, claiming its pricing was “incorrect” due to stress. And so, Doug Ford has become a bigger hero in these times.

Essentially absurd resistance

Peter MacKay continued to argue that choosing a permanent opposition leader was an “essential service” amidst the pandemic—at least until the Conservative leadership race was officially put on pause. Team MacKay kept on fighting the inevitable to the brink via memes: a rotary phone as an insurgent symbol, and an island in California.

Sussexit has forsaken Vancouver Island for a house in Hollywood. Prince Harry and Meghan Markle reportedly picked the U.S. to hunker down in a secluded compound. The Duchess of Sussex will virtually resurface as narrator of a Disney documentary, Elephants.

The stars are simmering down

After the initial blasts of celebrity isolation content, the inanity seems to have waned, or pivoted to reflect corporate interests. The earlier COVID-19 concerns brought us a declaration of independence from Evangeline Lilly. But after laying low for 10 days, the Canadian actress returned to Instagram to say she’s now staying inside:

Quibi still expects to start streaming despite all the complications. The Hollywood Reporter probes a new reality for the $2-billion mobile video platform, whose planned April 6 launch is tethered to Bell Canada. But the screen distractions keep on coming, like TIFF and Crave debuting a Stay-at-Home Cinema series with The Princess Bride.

Finally, seeing trees in a forest

Sakura Watch, created by graphic designer Steven Joniak to track the progress of Toronto’s blooming cherry trees, started the spring with shots of buds as a sign of something to anticipate. But with that section of High Park now officially closed, and John Tory saying the blossoms may have to be televised, it’s entirely up in the air: